Saturday, July 2, 2011

Mommy needs a what???

I fully admit that I have learned a LOT since becoming a full-time mommy. There was no book to prepare me for life after baby. No one calls from the hospital to ask how things are going - they really do let you just walk out of the place with no questions asked whatsoever. I still maintain there should have been some type of quiz involved prior to our seemingly rushed but otherwise uneventful departure. The first few weeks home are a baptism-by-fire kind of situation. You're in survival mode and you do what you have to do in order to get by. "Keep on keepin' on" as I say. You learn quickly and what you still don't know, you Google!

Even 8 months out, I am still more than eager to find answers to the unknowns by using my crazy-mad Internet search skills for the things I'm still unfamiliar with. There are the very philosophical things like "How am I ever going to teach this child everything he needs to know to become a decent and caring person?" You know... the deep stuff. Alternatively, there are the very practical everyday questions like "Should I use OxyClean or Dreft to get this particular kind of poop out of these (meaning the baby's, not mine) pants?" And when it comes right down to it, the two questions are pretty much tied for my brain-space most of the time. This triggered some sort of inner alarm and I felt the need to Google something brilliant.

After trying to cut and paste my thoughts together long enough to make a coherent query, the light bulb above my head went off and I thought of the perfect search phrase: "Coping skill for stay at home mothers." Peace settled within me as my inquisitive thought/question was thrown out into Cyberland. Within the milliseconds Google takes to return my search, my browser was full of answers to my predicament. I quickly clicked on the first result and was astonished by the site's answer for mothers in a rut...

Their response was: Drink up!

I guess if you anaesthetise any situation enough, you're bound to get the answer, or in this case peace, that you're looking for. Really people? Yes, yes they did! There is in fact a site that advocates mommies getting back their sanity by throwing back the booze. Don't get me wrong. I'm all for a good time and I love my cocktails  - when the time is right. I'm no hater when it comes to a good time. But, I think I'm going to have to stick with separating parenting from partying - at least 'til he's 21. (Just kidding!)